It seems as though death is looming all around me right now. I don’t know if it’s because it’s a full moon lately or what. I, myself, have experienced three losses in the last two weeks and friends of mine have also experienced loss recently (or the anniversary of someone close to them passing away). During my most recent experience, I found myself feeling angry, confused, sad, regretful, and a lot of other mixed up emotions. Sometimes I completely forget the stages of grief. You may be familiar with them already. In case you’re not, they are: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.
Denial is being in denial of the death. Experiencing total shock, disbelief, almost like life isn’t real right now. “Are they really gone?”
Anger at the world, life, God (if you believe in him), at the deceased person depending on how they passed away. “Why me? ….or How could you?”
Bargaining if only I had done something differently. “I should have called more…I should have reached out…I should have spent more time with them…”
Depression feeling really sad they’re gone. (Obviously)
Acceptance is being able to accept the reality they’re gone.
It’s helpful knowing these stages and being aware of where you may be when you’re experiencing grief or loss. They aren’t necessarily experienced in that order and the time in experiencing them can vary person to person. In being aware of them, my hope is to help you or anyone else who happens to experience it, from engaging in an Affinity as a way to cope with the feelings.
So now what, Dani??
My action step suggestion is to think of good times, happy memories you had with that person. Think of things about them that make you laugh. Remember them with light in your heart, rather than darkness in your space.