“We sabotage the great things in our lives because deep down we don’t feel worthy of having the great things.” – Taressa Riazzi
We tend to want what we want and we usually want it now.
Sometimes we’ll get that thing we wanted and either not appreciate it or eventually not care if we lose it…
We may even do things out of spite or not caring of the consequences…
This is because, although we have big desires, if we don’t really truly feel worthy of having that desire to our core, we could end up behaving in ways in which we sabotage having that thing.
This is called self-sabotage.
Self-Sabotage in relationships and work looks like:
- Criticizing your partner/co workers
- Holding grudges
- Ignoring negative emotions
Self-Sabotaging behavior that might be keeping you from achieving your life goals:
- Procrastinating
- Overthinking
- Assuming
- Avoiding
Here are 5 signs you may be self sabotaging:
1. Negative Self Talk: We don’t pay attention to how we talk to ourselves nearly as much as we should. There is a voice that is constantly running in our head – yours is deciding whether you want to keep reading this article or not…or whether you like me…or maybe what you’re going to eat next? That voice is constantly running and there is no stopping it. Take notice of how you talk to yourself when things get challenging – “C’mon Dani we can do this!” or “Ugh, we can’t do this! How are we going to do this?!!”
2. Imposter Syndrome: Imposter Syndrome can have us feeling like we’re a fraud, feeling like we are not good enough to deserve our success. We feel inadequate despite evident, well-deserved success. We think everyone else deserves success, but for some reason, we don’t.
3. Isolating: We are human beings and human beings thrive on connection. We THINK isolating feels comfortable….but think about it…. Is it really? Feeling disconnected, alone, and sad? It may seem like such a chore getting out of the house and connecting with others, but you’ll feel so much better afterwards (think about when you hate going to the gym, and how good you feel afterwards when you went anyway).
4. Procrastination: “I’ll do it tomorrow..” “…it’s already half way through the week, I’ll start on Monday.” Procrastination ends up leading to stress and anxiety for not getting things done. Plus it starts to snow ball into an unproductive behavior pattern.
5. Not Taking Care of Yourself: aka Self Care. I used to think self care meant getting my nails done and getting massages. Self care also includes setting boundaries, learning how to say no, making sure I’m eating healthy (relatively) and getting enough sleep.
Awareness is key. Once we begin noticing these behaviors, we can then begin to do something about them. It’s never too late to begin the journey of transformation.
Interested in learning more? Check out my YouTube Video on Emotional Intelligence Awareness:
love always,
dani
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p.s. Whenever you’re ready… here are a couple of ways you and I can connect beyond this article:
1. Grab a copy of my Amazon bestselling book, Stories of an Ex-Party Girl: How to feel happy and good about yourself without alcohol and drugs It’s a tell all guide on how to create a joy-filled life, without needing validation and fulfillment from other things or people. You can grab it on Amazon and on Kindle. — Click Here.
2. Join our FREE community! The Affinity Lounge is a community; a resource – teaching effective tools to build confidence and feel worthy again whether post-break up, single, or in a relationship.